FUNDACIÓN VÍCTIMAS DEL TERRORISMO 96 - ENGLISH

EDUCATION AND COEXISTENCE 24 the work of research and remembrance led her to question that silence. “I felt compelled, pushed to speak,” she said. From then on, she began publicly defen- ding the memory of her father and the other victims. For Alicia, “remembrance is not only an act of justice”, but also “a moral commitment to the truth”. VÍCTOR PAVÓN: GROWING UP WITH AN ABSENCE On the afternoon of 12 April 1985, Víctor was playing with toy cars on the terrace of the El Descanso restaurant, waiting with his parents and family friends to go inside for a birthday celebration. He was three and a half. The next thing he remembers is a flash, then dust, rubble and screams. His father managed to find him, and they both went inside to look for his mother, who had entered shortly beforehand to ask how long they would have to wait for their table and to use the toilet. She did not survive the explosion. What followed was marked by a lack of explanations. Víctor says he never spoke at length with his family about what ha- ppened, and it became a taboo. “I have never sat down with my family to discuss it,” he said. Meanwhile, he kept asking about his mother, and his father would TESTIMONIES For Alicia, speaking about that day also means speaking about the man her fa- ther was before he became a victim of terrorism. She remembers him as young, affectionate, cheerful and devoted to his family, with a great sense of humour and a passion for cooking. He had begun working as a cook after military service and dreamed of opening his own restau- rant one day. His two daughters, Sara and Alicia, were then the centre of his life. That morning, he left home as usual and his wife said goodbye from the bal- cony. An everyday gesture that neither imagined would be their last. For the first few hours, the family thou- ght Francisco would return. When they learnt the scale of the attack, they began searching for him in different hospitals. Eventually, they discovered that he had died while being taken in an ambulance and had been identified by his wedding ring. From that moment, family life changed completely. At home there re- mained silences, sadness and an anger Alicia, still a child, could not explain. As the years passed, silence became one of the things that weighed most heavily on her. “The silence and the lies,” she ex- plained, recalling that time. ETA initially denied responsibility for the attack, and for years the family came to believe that others were responsible. It was not until 2018, 44 years later, that the terrorist or- ganisation admitted carrying it out. But the consequences went beyond un- certainty about what had happened. Alicia recalled that her family received no help in coping with the loss. “At the time, we never received psychological or financial support, not even a ‘how are you?’” She summed up those early years in a sentence: “The day my father did not come home, we closed the door and nobody knocked.” For many years, she too remained silent. The recovery of the attack’s history and Víctor Pavón Son of María de la Cruz García tell him that “she would be coming back”, never explaining that she had died. The tragedy also changed his relations- hip with his father. Although physically uninjured, his father was devastated, and Víctor’s grandparents and other relatives had to take care of him. He sums it up starkly: “That day I lost a mother and a father, because he stopped acting as one.” Years later, his experience has led him to insist that terrorism’s consequences extend beyond those who lose their li- ves. “The victim is not only the person who dies, but everyone around them,” he said. He also called for children to receive psychological help and support, which he and his family did not have at the time. “There were no protocols for victims,” he noted, describing that lack of support, particularly regrettable in the case of children. For Víctor, speaking now about what ha- ppened also means giving words to an ex- perience that remained within his family for years. His testimony seeks to remind us that behind every attack are also children growing up with loss and families learning to live with it. MARÍA ESTHER SÁEZ: LAMENT OR FIGHT Esther remembers that morning of 11 March from inside a train carriage. Around 50 people were travelling in it, and, she explained, virtually all of them died. She survived, but suffered extre- mely serious injuries. Unlike other survivors, she never lost consciousness. She remembers the hole torn in the train, the bodies around her and the feeling that someone had wanted to end her life. But she also remembers the people who entered the carriage to rescue her. One carried her out of the train and stayed beside her, constantly encouraging her.